Day 12 | 2.26.21

KIA Lodge & Departure

Where are all the people? I’ve forgotten about the pandemic and the loss and the pain for just a moment the birds are singing and I feel the symphony of before. Before death, before this new life I never wanted. And then I notice that the airstrip is quiet and I wonder if I will leave this place intact or perhaps fuller than before. Suspended in a world where the language barrier keeps me from fear and as long as I have 100,000 shillings I have a place to call home. The night is cold but the airstrip is quiet and my eyes ache and I know it’s time to leave. I am dangerously close to forgetting; I wonder if I played a part. In 30 hours I will know the consequences of seeking the stars from my little spot in the sun.

Sing to me sweetly morning symphony.

Tanzania, I will say goodbye now. 

The resorts are empty. Waking up in this post-apocalyptic world, it is easy to see life taking back it’s raw landscape. Off property the markets are busy and there are angels in the street. But tourism died with Covid and suddenly my private experience becomes an embarrassment as I cry for air when there are people starving. I did not create this system but I took my place. Another cup of coffee please, another sunrise. I don’t want to go home and I can’t stay here. The buffet for one can’t last.

Kiongozi, What’s next? What’s next? What’s next? 

I witness the haze,

Brought on by early sunrise.

Time to say goodbye.

Kilimanjaro,

You taught me to breathe again.

And you gave me life.